Spawn An Early Comic Book Adaptation That Fails to Bring Hell to Earth

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Looking back, the year 1997 was not a good one for superhero movies. Of course, Joel Schumacher’s (Flatliners) Batman & Robin is the fiasco with which cinephiles are most familiar. But 1997 is also the same year that dropped Mortal Kombat: Annihilation later in the fall. Somewhere in between these two turkeys, New Line Cinema teamed up with comic creator Todd McFarlane to adapt McFarlane’s Spawn for the big screen. Though its story of an assassin turned into a Hellspawn in the Devil’s army would certainly fit in the superhero-saturated movie market today, audiences showed only modest interest in the late 90s. Neither were critics who hated the adaptation.

Synopsis

Al Simmons, a CIA operative and world-assassin, has grown increasingly weary with the nature of his work. Fearing Simmons has become a liability, his superior Jason Wynn orders his death. When Simmons finds himself banished to Hell itself, he agrees to return to Earth as a Hellspawn – a soldier in Malebolgia’s army – in return for seeing his wife again. Caught in the middle of an ongoing war between heaven and hell, Simmons must choose between justice and his personal quest for vengeance.

Spawn And Its Obscure Comic Property Were Released 20 Years Too Early

When Spawn hit the cineplexes in the summer of ’97, audiences weren’t used to a never-ending carousel of superhero movies. Kevin Feige and Marvel can throw together B- and C-level comic book characters into big-budget movies today and audiences will show up. However, Batman was the only A-list superhero showing up in big-budget movies in the 90s. And even the Caped Crusader wasn’t bulletproof. Comic creator Todd MacFarlane’s Spawn was an odd choice for a big budget summer release. Its grim mix of horror and action worked for the very good HBO cartoon adaptation. Yet 90s’s filmgoers didn’t seem too sure what to make of a ‘serious’ comic book movie starring a largely unknown character and a rotund demon clown as the villain.

…Dippé seems more interested in visual spectacle and, as a result, Spawn plays more like a music video than proper narrative.

None of these strikes necessarily doomed Spawn to disaster. No, director Mark A.Z. Dippé and writer Alan B. McElroy (Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers, Wrong Turn) took care of that themselves. With dialogue that’s almost entirely dedicated to exposition and world-building alongside an oddly paced and edited story, Spawn often borders on incoherence. That is, Dippé strings together his scenes in ways that sometimes feel random. ‘Stuff sort of just happens’ feels like the best way to describe the movie. In fact, Dippé seems more interested in visual spectacle and, as a result, Spawn plays more like a music video than proper narrative.

Spawn Is Probably Best Remembered For Its Soundtrack, Not The Movie Itself

And the music video label seems pretty fitting. Twenty five years since its release, audiences arguably best remember Spawn for its soundtrack that fused together the biggest acts in heavy metal and electronica at the time. It was a similar approach adopted by the Judgment Night soundtrack a few years earlier that featured collaborations between hip hop and rock artists. Near the end of 1997, much of the 90s alternative and grudge movement was coming to an end. Nevertheless, Spawn The Album, which featured metal acts like Korn, Silverchair, Metallica, and Marilyn Manson collaborating with trip-hop bands including The Crystal Method, Sneaker Pimps, and The Prodigy, was a hit with music fans. Arguably, the album’s legacy far outpaced the movie itself.

This should have been a Rated-R mix of action and horror. Instead, Spawn showed up in theaters with a PG-13 tag and suffered for it.

Another major problem that emerged with Spawn was its treatment of the violent subject matter that defined the comics upon which it was based. To be fair to Dippé and McIlroy, the studio neutered the movie. This should have been a Rated-R mix of action and horror. Instead, Spawn showed up in theaters with a PG-13 tag and suffered for it. Outside of the soundtrack, John Leguizamo (Violent Night) shines under a lot of makeup as the irreverent Clown/Violator. Though he often veers toward being a bit too much, Leguizamo is consistently a fun part of a movie that feels like a slog. Everyone else in the cast feels wasted. Worst of all, Spawn’s state-of-the-art visual effects have aged poorly. This leaves little to recommend to contemporary audiences.

Spawn Feels Like a Comic Property Ripe for a Reboot

From start to finish, Spawn stands as an absolute mess of an action-horror movie. Simply put, a multitude of problems plagued this early superhero adaptation. Among its major problems, McElroy’s story is borderline incoherent and Dippé’s direction makes it worse resulting in an oddly paced, poorly edited mess where each subsequent scene feels only loosely connected to the previous one. What passed for state-of-the art effects now look terribly dated. And only Leguizamo walks away unscathed with his wildly fun performance. Well, Leguizamo and its electronica-metal mixed soundtrack survive intact. But Spawn is 90s movie that absolutely benefit from a reboot to cash in on the superhero craze before it runs out of gas.

THE FINAL VERDICT: LEAVE IT IN THE 90S

The Sword and the Sorcerer a Run-of-the-Mill, But Fun, Foray Into Fantasy

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For a brief period in the 1980s, sword and sandal fantasy movies ruled video store shelves. While Clash of the Titans recalled 60s and 70s swashbucklers like Jason and the Argonauts and the Sinbad series, Conan the Barbarian was a pulpier, violent epic. Following Conan’s box office success, film studios rushed to capitalize with their own loincloth-clad warriors. Don Coscarelli (Phantasm) directed The Beastmaster, Joe D’Amato made Ator, The Fighting Eagle, and muscleman Lou Ferrigno played Hercules. None of these movies were particularly good. But right around the same time Arnold Schwarzenegger was getting his big break, another sword and sorcery movie found success. Critics weren’t big on The Sword and the Sorcerer considering it a knockoff.

Synopsis

To overthrow his rival, King Richard, and conquer the land of Ehdan, the evil King Cromwell enlists the aid of a demonic sorcerer. Though Cromwell’s crusade lands him the kingdom, King Richard’s son, Talon, escapes along with his father’s triple-bladed sword. Years later, Talon, now a mercenary and adventurer, returns. As a rebellion rises against Cromwell, Talon reluctantly joins with vengeance on his mind.

The Sword and the Sorcerer Won’t Find Itself on Critics’ ‘Best Of’ Lists

On any technical measure of film-making excellent, The Sword and the Sorcerer is not a good movie. There’s a long list of things wrong with director Albert Pyun’s foray into the world of swords, sandals, tyrants, and sorcerers. Though it’s by no means as low-budget as Ferrigno’s Hercules movies or Yor, Hunter From the Future, its fantasy world feels much smaller than what Conan the Barbarian offered. And its tone feels wildly inconsistent. Sometimes Pyun seems to be going for a fun, brisk adventure in the vein of Raiders of the Lost Ark. But the humor misses more than it hits. Moreover, The Sword and the Sorcerer has enough violence and gratuitous nudity to ensure a PG rating wasn’t happening.

After a promising opening act, The Sword and the Sorcerer quickly lapses into a generic fantasy plot.

Still tonal problems weren’t the biggest issue with The Sword and the Sorcerer. Pyun, and co-writers Tom Karnowski and John V. Stuckmeyer penned a pretty run-of-the-mill story. After a promising opening act, The Sword and the Sorcerer quickly lapses into a generic fantasy plot. Stuff kind of happens. Occasionally, it feels like a scene got cut by mistake. All of the characters are one-dimensional. Television star Lee Horsley is charismatic enough as Talon, but still feels out of place. Veteran baddie Richard Lynch (Halloween) appropriately chews the scenery.

The Sword and the Sorcerer – Limp Action Choreography, Great Sword

In spite of all its limitations, The Sword and the Sorcerer is by no means a bad movie. In fact, it was – and still is – a fun effort. Truth be told, Pyun actually surprises with a handful of decent scenes that still hold up today. Both its opening and closing scenes with demonic sorcerer Xusia shine. Whether it’s ripping the heart out from a follower or tearing himself out from another body, the practical effects that created Xusia are impressive. Though most of the action choreography is clumsy, Pyun also stages a fairly impressive final battle. In addition, the pacing is brisk – The Sword and the Sorcerer doesn’t overstay its welcome.

Truth be told, Pyun actually surprises with a handful of decent scenes that still hold up today.

Much of the movie’s appeal also lies in its (un)intentional silliness. If you were a kid in the early 1980s, there’s a good chance you wanted a triple-bladed sword replica just like Talon. Nothing about the movie’s signature weapon makes any sense. Just carrying a sword with three blades would be heavy let alone trying to swing it. How does the sword shoot its blades like projectiles? Where does Talon get his replacement blades? There’s a sandbox logic to the prop, but it works regardless. When you were ten years old, there wasn’t anything much cooler than it. However, some of the movie’s humor – and its use of female characters – wouldn’t fly at all today.

The Sword and the Sorcerer is Better Than It Has Any Right to Be

Derivative, formulaic, and often clumsy, The Sword and the Sorcerer has no business being entertaining. Some actors are miscast, others deliver wooden performances. There’s stuff here that wouldn’t fly in a movie today. But here’s the thing – The Sword and the Sorcerer is a fun movie in spite of all these issues. Yes, nostalgia probably gives this one a boost for anyone who grew up in the 80s. Nonetheless, a handful of impressive practical effect scenes bookend the movie. And it’s breezy, light fun. No one’s going to mistake it for a classic, but there’s a reason this one still has its fans after all these years.

THE FINAL VERDICT: SO BAD, IT’S GOOD

Valentine Makes For a Bad Valentine’s Day Date

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Welcome to everyone’s least favourite fake holiday – Valentine’s Day. During the golden era of the slasher, studios gave just about every calendar holiday the movie treatment. Even April Fool’s Day was treated to a horror movie adaptation. When Wes Craven turned the subgenre on its head with Scream he inadvertently re-ignited a brief slasher-lite renaissance. Over the next few years, several slasher movies got the green light with varying levels of success. Though they all dutifully recycled the tropes, none had Scream’s self-awareness. At the tail-end of this revival, the ultra-derivative Valentine was dumped into theatres and quickly forgotten.

Synopsis

At their sixth grade dance, awkward and shy Jeremy Melton asks several popular girls to dance. Though he is rejected one after the other, Dorothy shows some kindness and accepts. But when other kids catch them kissing him under the bleachers, Dorothy lies and accuses Jeremy of attacking her. Several bullies then beat Jeremy up, humiliating him. Years later, someone is sending menacing Valentine’s Day cards to the same girls who rejected Jeremy. Now a figure wearing a Cherub mask is stalking and killing them one by one. Has Jeremy Melton returned to seek his revenge?

Valentine Tastes Like a Cheap Box of No-Name Chocolate

Where to start? First and foremost, Valentine possesses all the originality of no-name pharmacy store Valentines Day chocolate. With a screenplay that borders on lazy, this is the cinematic equivalent of a bowl of melting vanilla ice cream. No less than four screenwriters riff off familiar stereotypes standing in for characters. Marley Shelton is Kate Davies, the ‘nice one’ and obvious ‘final girl’. Denise Richards plays ‘Paige’ the ‘promiscuous one’, and Jessica Capshaw is Dorothy, the formerly overweight, insecure one. Even new horror fans shouldn’t have trouble figuring who dies and in what order.

…most of these red herrings are killed as quickly as they’re introduced.

Of course, lazy script-writing can still get you a passing grade in slashers if you can deliver a memorable killer. Sadly, Valentine disappoints like a bad blind date. The movie’s killer wears a cherub mask that is the exact opposite of scary; he also gets nosebleeds after every murder. Director Jamie Blanks (Urban Legend) introduces red herrings only to instantly discard them. Is Gary, the pervert neighbour, the adult Jeremy Melton? Or is it Campbell, the gold-digging boyfriend? Maybe David Boreanz’s Adam, Kate’s alcoholic ex-boyfriend, is the killer. At the time of its release, Boreanz was riding the wave of Angel. At least Bones was waiting for him after this dud.

Valentine Knows The Set-Up, But Can’t Order Up The Scares

Arguably, Valentine’s biggest problem is that it’s not scary. Ever. Instead, Valentine is a flavourless assortment of tired tropes. Victims run but are somehow still caught by a killer who never breaks from a brisk stride. If you’re concerned about getting too scared there’s no need to worry. That rising crescendo of creepy music lets you know when the jump scares are coming. Just be forewarned that contrived fake-out proceeds almost every attempt at a scare. In fact, Valentine’s just missing that scene where the victim adjusts the bathroom mirror and the killer appears.

While it’s rated-R, the death scenes are largely bloodless and pretty straightforward.

In contrast to classic 1980’s slashers, the slasher-lite renaissance that followed Scream were surprisingly light on both graphic violence and nudity. Unfortunately for gorehounds, Valentine is no different. In spite of its R-rating, Blank’s death scenes are largely bloodless and too often straightforward. One scene involving a hot tub cover and drill is entertaining, but it’s not enough to energize this lifeless slasher. When a floating head surfaces in a pond it gives the audience a pretty strong hint as to why the camera cuts away quickly during most of the film’s kills – the special effects are cheap-looking.

Swipe Left On Valentine

At over an hour and half, Valentine long overstays its welcome. Nothing remotely scary happens during this time. Even worse, the ending offers an absolutely pointless fake-out that is both obvious and a rip-off. Like a bad online dating profile, Valentine knows what audiences want to see, but only offers a photo-shopped imitation. If you’re planning on staying in this Valentine’s Day and are looking for a good scary movie, swipe left on Valentine.

THE PROFESSOR’S FINAL GRADE: C-

Yellowjackets Instantly Defines Itself as ‘Must See’ Television

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Since Stranger Things became a massive breakout success for Netflix, streaming platforms and networks have jostled for the next winning mix of teen drama and supernatural mystery. Some of these shows (Chambers, The Society) never made it past a first season. Other series haven’t made the same cultural impact (The A-List). But Amazon Prime’s The Wilds reminded us that a young cast, contemporary issues, and classic concepts could yield big ratings. Like The Wilds, Yellowjackets strands teen girls – in Northern Ontario this time – in a story that’s one part Lord of the Flies and one part Lost. And just like The Wilds, Yellowjackets has become a cultural sensation.

Synopsis

In 1996, a high school girls soccer team, the Yellowjackets, boarded a plane for the national state championships. But they never made it. Somewhere over Northern Canada, their plane crashed and stranded the survivors in the remote wilderness. Years later the survivors struggle to distance themselves from what happened in the woods. But some secrets refuse to stay in the past.

Yellowjackets Finds a New, Exciting Voice in Old Ideas

Straight from its opening scene, Yellowjackets hooks you and never lets go. Episode One director Karyn Kusama’s (Jennifer’s Body, The Invitation) opening shots of girls clad in fur and animal masks cooking and eating one of their own sets a haunting tone. But series creators Ashley Lyle and Bart Nickerson aren’t interested in just updating Lord of the Flies. Across its ten episodes, Yellowjackets patiently – and mostly – show us how its girls soccer team ends up hunting one another. Plenty of questions are left for a second season. And more questions pop up in its season finale. In between its first and final episode, Yellowjackets weaves a thrilling mystery with fleshed out psychological drama.

But series creators Ashley Lyle and Bart Nickerson aren’t interested in just updating Lord of the Flies.

One one hand, Yellowjackets clearly borrows from 2000s supernatural hit, Lost. Both its story structure – a past and present scenes – and hints of supernatural elements should feel familiar. Still Lyle and Nickerson expertly maintain a veil over just how much the supernatural figures into their story. Who is Adam? Can Lottie really see things that have not happened yet? What does that symbol mean? Whose body did the girls find in the abandoned cabin? Part of the fun in watching the series are all the theories. Unlike Lost, however, Yellowjackets better mixes in the psychological elements and never feels like its setting itself up for a narrative failure.

Yellowjackets Gives Its Excellent Cast Compelling Characters to Inhabit

In addition to its deft handling of mystery, Yellowjackets assembles an excellent cast of young up-and-coming stars and talented veterans. Part of the series’ strength is the moral ambiguity of its adult characters contrasted with the regular – and extraordinary – struggles of their young counterparts. Each adult character’s trauma elevates the series into something more than just a thriller. Amongst a standout cast, Juliette Lewis and Christina Ricci turn in powerhouse performances. Lewis’ Natalie balances a tough, weathered exterior with vulnerability. And Ricci’s ‘Misty’ – and oddball and very dangerous outcast – may the most interesting character. One of Season Two’s bigger questions is just how much of a threat Misty poses. And their younger counterparts, Sophie Thatcher and Sammi Hanratty – equally impress.

Among a standout cast, Juliette Lewis and Christina Ricci turn in powerhouse performances.

Yet is Melanie Lynskey and and Tawny Cypress’ more understated performances that allow Yellowjackets to explore the various ways in which trauma impacts us. As Natalie notes, ‘You guys are just as fucked up as I am. You’re just better at hiding it.’ On the surface, Lynskey’s ‘Shauna’ and Cypress’ Taissa’ appear to have their lives in order. With each passing, however, Yellowjackets shows us the various ways in which their shared traumatic experiences have infected their lives. One of the more impressive parts of the series has to be its ability to cast the perfect younger performers. Playing teen ‘Shauna’ and ‘Taissa’, Sophie Nélisse and Jasmin Savoy Brown (Sound of Violence) future stars. All of Yellowjackets’ drama, mystery, and horror is set against an epic 90s soundtrack. And never skip the amazing opening credits.

Yellowjackets …

Don’t let anyone tell you we’re not in another ‘Golden Age’ of television. With multiple streaming platforms – from Netflix to Amazon to Disney – developing their own content, we’re getting more high-quality programming than we have the time to actually watch. Now Yellowjackets is officially a buzzworthy series that absolutely deserves the praise. Mixing bits of Lost with Lord of the Flies, Yellowjackets puts its own spin on the concept while giving its female cast a strong voice. Having learned the lesson of past shows, including The X-Files and Lost, the show’s creators understand the importance of advancing their story while still keeping some things under wraps. Now we just have to wait patiently for Season 2.

THE PROFESSOR’S FINAL GRADE: A+

Midnight Mass Delivers a Horrifying Sermon to Horror Fans

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Over the last decade, Mike Flanagan has assembled an impressive horror résumé. Alongside James Wan (Malignant, Saw), he’ll likely find his name mentioned next to all-time greats like Carpenter and Craven. He’s moved from small thrillers (Oculus, Hush) to big-screen scares (Ouija: Origin of Evil) to marque Stephen King adaptations (Doctor Sleep). Both his Netflix series – The Haunting of Hill House and The Haunting of Bly Manor – were triumphs of subtle horror storytelling. Now Flanagan’s newest Netflix series, Midnight Mass, is streaming just in time for Halloween season. Not surprisingly, critics are raving about the results, which recall some of the best of Stephen King adaptations.

Synopsis

After a tragic accident and several years in prison, a disgraced Riley Flynn returns to his family home on the isolated Crockett Island. What he finds is a community in decline and dwindling faith. But that changes when a young priest Father Paul Hill replaces the island parish’s aging Monsignor Pruitt. His charismatic sermons and strange miracles galvanize the small community. No one suspects that Father Paul is hiding a dark secret that stalks Crocket Island while they sleep at night.

Midnight Mass a Haunting Exploration of the Dangers of Unquestioning Faith

As his career has progressed, Mike Flanagan has increasingly favoured slow-burn atmosphere over loud, stylish scares. Horror fans craving gore, quick scares, and rapidly paced story may be disappointed with Midnight Mass. Flanagan emphasizes atmosphere, characters, and story resulting in a methodical pace. While Flanagan executes the series’ horror elements with considerable style, they are few and far apart. Moreover, audiences will likely figure out some of what’s going on very early into the seven episodes. There’s definitely some immediate comparisons to Salem’s Lot. Not all of the twists shock as might have been intended. Nevertheless, Midnight Mass ensures there’s a payoff to the winding buildup. What unfolds in the penultimate episode, Act of the Apostles, is uncomfortable and horrifying.

Flanagan emphasizes atmosphere, characters, and story resulting in a methodical pace.

What separates Midnight Mass from other horror series, like Scream or Slasher, are Flanagan’s bigger themes. Here, audiences will find Flanagan musing about faith, religion, and immortality. By and large, the director and writers nails these ideas. Midnight Mass is at its best exposing the horrors of unquestioning faith and the hypocrisy behind some of the most ardent ideologies. But Midnight Mass is sometimes too enamored with its own ideas. One could argue that the series could have cut out one episode. And there’s probably a monologue or two that slow things down too much.

Midnight Mass Finds Flanagan Regulars and Newcomers in Fine Form

Like his previous Netflix series, Flanagan has assembled an impressive cast including several regular collaborators. Yet in spite of several strong performances, Hamish Linklater steals the show with an absolutely captivating performance. Linklater injects ‘Father Paul’ with so much charisma and passion that it’s never hard to buy his congregation’s blind allegiance. Still Linklater’s best moments come in the series’ quieter scenes where he’s able to embrace the character’s more complex morality. Certainly, it helps that Flanagan has penned a screenplay that avoids too many tired clichés. In addition to Linklater, Samantha Sloyan’s ‘Bev Keane’ may be the most loathsome television villain since Joffrey.

…Hamish Linklater steals the show with an absolutely captivating performance.

Though Linklater and Sloyan stand out from the crown, Midnight Mass’ ensemble cast all shine. Zack Gilford quietly reminds us why we liked him so much in Friday Night Lights, while Henry Thomas completely disappears into his role. Once again working with her off-screen husband, Kate Siegel offers the series an anchor, also delivering one its most emotionally powerful moments. As Crockett Island’s Muslim sheriff, Rahul Kohli makes a strong case for more headlining roles. And Flanagan regulars Annabeth Gish and Alex Essoe (Midnighters) both have their moments to deliver the goods.

Midnight Mass …

Overall, Midnight Mass finds a master of his craft at the top of his game, if not feeling a bit verbose. And yes, even with only seven episodes, Midnight Mass occasionally feels long in the tooth. Arguably, there’s one too many monologues on faith, immortality, and death. But there’s no denying the series’ emotional payoff. Moreover, when Midnight Mass gets down to the business of scares, Flanagan does it better than just about anyone. His reliance on atmosphere and tone over superficial jumps ensures that scenes like the penultimate episode’s ‘midnight mass’ are shocking.

THE PROFESSOR’S FINAL GRADE: A

Prisoners of the Ghostland A Less Satisfying Gonzo Vehicle for Nicolas Cage

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Earlier this month, Nicolas Cage declared he is “never going to retire from acting”. Depending on your perspective, that’s either a promise or a threat. Regardless Cage has definitely found himself amidst a career resurgence courtesy of embracing some gonzo roles. Critics praised Cage’s performance in Michael Samoski’s Pig, which came out this past summer. Cage’s willingness to star in, well, just about anything, has also seen him pop up in some surprisingly fun genre fare. Both Mandy and Color Out of Space were trippy psychedelic horror movies that have already earned cult followings. Neither Mom and Dad nor Willy’s Wonderland are classics, but they’re both fun to varying degrees. For now, we’ll ignore the Ghost Rider movies. Now Cage is back with a bomb rigged to his testicles in Sion Sono’s Prisoners of the Ghostland.

Synopsis

In the quarantined, ravaged Samurai Town, a ruthless warlord, Governor, rules over the people. He’s created a world subject to his own musings – a combination of feudal Japan and the Wild West. And he forces young women into his own personal harem, calling them his ‘granddaughters’. When Bernice, one of these slaves, escapes into the “Ghostland’, Governor frees a violent bank robber, Hero, offering him freedom in exchange for returning his ‘granddaughter’.

Prisoners of the Ghostland Looks Good Even If It All Makes Little Sense

Much of the effort into writing this review was put into the above synopsis. And to be perfectly honest, I had to look up many of those plot points. Simply put, Aaron Hendry and Reza Sixo Safai’s screenplay isn’t just gonzo – it’s almost incomprehensible. For some people, Prisoners of the Ghostland will be wonderfully incomprehensible. Others may find themselves completely lost in what’s admittedly a creative and wild world. Even if you’ve watched a fair share of dystopian movies, you’ve probably never seen anything quite like Prisoners of the Ghostland. Still you’d be hard-pressed to convince anyone that you got that much out of the movie’s story. Yes, Prisoners of the Ghostland fuses together neo-noir, Westerns, samurai movies, and dystopian subgenres into something completely unique. Just don’t expect to understand much of the basic plot. Prisoners of the Ghostland is meant to be experienced, not understood.

For some people, Prisoners of the Ghostland will be wonderfully incomprehensible. Others may find themselves completely lost …

But as a viewing experiencing, Sion Sono’s feature is certainly unique. The eclectic Japanese filmmaker crafts several eye-popping scenes. Oftentimes you’ll need to pause the movie just to pick out and appreciate some of his attention to detail. If the story itself isn’t always moving forward, Sono ensures the screen is always busy. Everything here feels as eccentric as George Miller’s post-apocalyptical world of Max Max did 40 years ago. Of course, none of this means Prisoners of the Ghostland is entertaining. In addition to a plodding pace, the movie is often a silly mess that feels like it’s trying to too hard to be quirky.

Prisoners of the Ghostland Finds Nicolas Cage in an ‘Explosive’ Performance

Amidst the movie’s bizarro world, Nicolas Cage once again finds himself front row and center in a eccentric, gonzo role. And for the second time in 2021, Cage plays a character with no real name – he’s credited as Hero – after playing ‘The Janitor’ in Willy’s Wonderland. However, in Prisoners of the Ghostland, Cage actually has dialogue, which he chews along with the scenery in the kind of performance that earned him Razzie nominations for The Wicker Man, Ghost Rider, etc. Yet somewhere along the lines everyone finally got in on the joke. Audiences want to see Nicolas Cage go ‘Full Cage’. And Prisoners of the Ghostland suits Cage up in a bomb-rigged leather jumpsuit before proceeding to blow off one of his testicles. That’s something that actually happens in the movie.

However, in Prisoners of the Ghostland, Cage actually has dialogue, which he chews along with the scenery …

Joining Cage in Prisoners of the Ghostland are a handful of familiar B-movie faces as well as Asian stars who fans of Japanese cinema may recognize. As Governor (and no, not The Walking Dead’s ‘Governor’) Bill Mosely (The Devil’s Rejects, Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2) turns in a reliably slimy performance as the movie’s villain. Ryuhei Kitamura (Downrange, The Midnight Meat Train) alum Tak Sakaguchi is the movie’s quiet MVP. That is, Sakaguchi has a presence that makes him one of the best things in the movie. Though Sofia Boutella (The Mummy) has plenty of creentime, it never really feels like she has much to do in the movie. You’ll also find Nick Cassavetes, Charles Glover, and Lorena Kotô in small, off-the-wall roles.

Prisoners of the Ghostland Not Quite ‘Balls to the Wall’ Fun

In some ways, a review of Prisoners of the Ghostland is pointless. This is a movie expressly made to be strange and inaccessible. It’s this inaccessibility that will likely appeal to those who enjoy it. Still there’s no denying that the movie feels like that unpopular kid in class trying really hard to get everyone’s attention. While Sono’s genre mash-ups are ambitious and the visuals stunning, Prisoners of the Ghostland is unnecessarily incomprehensible. And for a movie that blows off one of Cage’s testicles, it’s often a boring movie. Some people will live. Others will hate it. No one is likely to be ambivalent about it.

THE PRISONER’S FINAL GRADE: C+

The Girl Who Got Away Escapes Serial Killer Tropes

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After The Boy Behind The Door put children in the path of a dangerous killer, another serial killer thriller hits VOD platforms. This time its young girls in peril or, more specifically, one girl who escapes. From writer and director Michael Morrissey, The Girl Who Got Away picks up years after a young girl who escapes a female serial killer. But the killer’s prison escape shatters her happy existence and puts everyone around her at risk. Though its story sounds familiar, The Girl Who Got Away promises a somewhat different direction. So far critics haven’t given this one much of a look but audiences seem impressed.

Synopsis

Years ago, serial killer Elizabeth Caulfield abducted five young girls in a small New York town. Raising them as her own children, Caulfield subjected the girls to untold horrors before killing them. Only one girl escaped before Caulfield was caught. Now Caulfield has escaped during a prisoner transfer. The retired sheriff who arrested Caulfield fears for the safety of ‘The Girl Who Away’, an adult Christina Bowden, so he implores his former protégé to protect her. But when the bodies of those closest to Christina begin to turn up, the new sheriff questions the identity of the killer.

The Girl Who Got Away Eschews Standard Serial Killer Thrills for Engaging Mystery

Straight out of the gate, The Girl Who Got Away hooks you. Writer and director Michael Morrissey takes you out on a dark isolated road and quickly escalates things from uneasy to panic. By and large, however, this is as close to horror as the movie gets. For the remainder of its time, The Girl Who Got Away is more of a twisting mystery and thriller. In this regard, Morrissey crafts one of the more engrossing thrillers in recent memory. In spite of its serial killer origin, The Girl Who Got Away avoids nearly all the familiar tropes. Occasionally, Morrissey lapses into ‘slash and stalk’ scenes. Nonetheless, The Girl Who Got Away never indulges in the more exploitative aspects of its story. And Morrissey maintains a focus on suspense and the emotional investment of the story, particularly in the climax.

As Morrissey takes his story in an unexpected direction it feels organiz rather than a cheat.

In addition, The Girl Who Got Away actually builds its mystery and twists without convoluted plot developments. Here’s a thriller where characters’ behaviours often make sense and investigating officers ask sensible questions. As Morrissey takes his story in an unexpected direction it feels organic rather than a cheat. Quick flashbacks offer hints and a surprise reveal never contradicts what came earlier. Most importantly, Morrissey never spoon-feeds the audience. Though its ending is ambiguous, The Girl Who Got Away leaves you with enough information to piece things together.

The Girl Who Got Away Surprises with Layered Story and Characters

Perhaps what’s most surprising about The Girl Who Got Away is its layered treatment of a handful of characters and subplots. First, Morrissey’s screenplay joins the recent Halloween remake in taking some time to explore the emotional toll of past trauma. Lexi Johnson’s varied reactions to her returning past are afforded time. Moreover, Morrissey avoids lazy victim tropes. But The Girl Who Got Away also devotes some story to other characters including Chuwudi Iwuji’s Nigerian-born sheriff. Iwuji’s complicated relationship with the town’s past sheriff never distracts from the thriller’s central mystery. Instead, it fleshes out the character into a weathered man whose growing suspicions actually propel the story.

Iwuji’s complicated relationship with the town’s past sheriff never distracts from the thriller’s central mystery.

Strong performances courtesy of Johnson and Iwuji justify the movie’s layered story. As The Girl Who Got Away, Johnson mixes the same kind of vulnerability and strength we saw from Jamie Lee Curtis. And when the movie needs Johnson to to raise doubts about her mental state, the actress relies on subtle lapses more than melodramatics. Similarly, Iwuji shoulders his character’s past with a dignity that instantly makes him a compelling protagonist. Both performers communicate a lot about their characters without unnecessary exposition.

The Girl Who Got Away Shouldn’t Escape Your Attention

Less a horror movie and more a mix of thriller and mystery, The Girl Who Got Away delivers on its promised mystery. From its tense opening scene, Morrissey weaves a story that consistently engages right up to its ambiguously chilling conclusion. The thriller’s twists are subtle while its characters are surprisingly deep. Credit to Morrissey for balancing several characters while still maintaining a laser focus on his central story. What could have been another exploitative serial killer movie is instead a quietly impressive thriller that’s absolutely worth a look from audiences.

THE PROFESSOR’S FINAL GRADE: A-

Eye Without a Face Forgets To Hack Into Much-Needed Scares

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No, it’s not the classic 1960 French horror movie. And it’s not even the Billy Idol song. This latest indie horror release drops the ‘s’ for its techno horror adaptation of Alfred Hitchcock’s Rear Window. In fact, Eye Without a Face looks to meld bits of Hitchcock with more recent techno-thrillers, most notably Open Windows, and just about any horror movie with an agoraphobic character (Copycat, The Woman in the Window). But Eye Without a Face isn’t the first movie to exploit Hitchcock’s premise. Does it have anything new to add? To date, critics haven’t been very impressed.

Synopsis

Henry, a young man living in Los Angeles, suffers from overwhelming agoraphobic and anxiety. Aside from his aspiring YouTuber roommate, Eric, Henry’s only contact with the outside world is through the hacked webcams of women he watches. Each day Henry loses himself in the lives of these women seeing himself as something of a guardian to them. But when he suspects that one woman may be a serial killer, Henry’s life – and his sanity – fall out of control.

Eye Without a Face Doesn’t Lack For Ideas

Well, at least Eye Without a Face doesn’t lack for ideas. Of course, none of those ideas are wholly original. But writer and director Ramin Niami doesn’t lack for ambition. On its surface, Eye Without a Face is Rear Window updated with webcams and agoraphobia substituting for a broken leg. However, Henry’s predilection for watching women through their webcams feels creepier than Jimmy Stewart watching neighbours through a camera lens. So Niami instantly mashes up other movies influenced by Rear Window (Disturbia, Fright Night) and techno-thrillers like Open Windows and The Den. Too bad the director doesn’t seem interested in exploring the moral dilemma of Henry’s behaviour. And as the movie unfolds, Niami throws in more cinematic influences. Soon Eye Without a Face teases the possibility that a very mentally unstable Henry may be imagining everything. A serial killer narrative alongside some light slasher bits also eventually crop up.

Rather the movie requires characters to behave in completely implausible was to shoehorn this twist in at the end.

While the movie’s lack of focus overburdens itself, the bigger problem is the contrived twist. On one hand, Eye Without a Face peppers clues throughout its runtime. That’s not the problem. Rather the movie requires characters to behave in completely implausible ways to shoehorn this twist in at the end. In other words, Niami’s big final act twists requires a lot of mental gymnastics – from its characters and the audience. It also draws comparisons to a whole other set of thrillers, particularly Robert DeNiro’s mid-2000’s Hide and Seek.

Eye Without a Face Lacks Scares and Suspense

For a movie that feels overstuffed with ideas and obvious comparisons to other movies, not much happens in Eye Without a Face. After a promising opening scene that has a bit of suspense, Eye Without a Face immediately slows down to a grind. Specifically, Niami struggles with pacing and, as a result, the movie lacks much in the way of tension. The director also has trouble with the movie’s more horror-oriented scenes. For example, the handful of stalk-and-slash scenes feel more clumsy than scary. And just as it looks like the movie may pick up, Eye Without a Face succumbs to its unnecessary twist and some questionable character choices.

Both characters make mind-numbingly dumb decisions that further derail the movie.

Though none of the actors are particularly bad, no one stands out as good either. What Eye Without a Face gives audiences are some middle-of-road performances from actors burdened with some pretty stupid characters. As Henry, Dakota Shapiro is fine even if he’s not always compelling. While Vlada Verevko is flat as the potential serial killer, Luke Cook (Eric) at least channels some of the annoyingness you’d expect of a YouTuber. Both characters make mind-numbingly dumb decisions that further derail the movie. Some of the smaller supporting performances definitely fall on the wooden side.

Eye Without a Face Pulls Together a Lot of Ideas With Uninspiring Results

Though it’s watchable from start to finish, Eye Without a Face is pretty uninspiring stuff. Maybe Niami crams too many different ideas into a single movie. With elements taken from Rear Window, Open Windows (and similar techno-thrillers), and even DeNiro’s Hide and Seek, Eye Without a Face doesn’t leave itself any opportunity to explore the implications of its character’s voyeurism. What’s left are middle-of-the-road performances, a lack of suspense, and a forced twist. You may get through the movie, but you’re unlikely to care much about what you just watched.

THE PROFESSOR’S FINAL GRADE: C-